October 4, 2009


There haven't been many girls who have influenced me, bettered me, hurt me or made me feel special and good. And those who did any of that, could not be with me for long for some or the other reason.

Circumstance is a cruel word. So is Time.

However, there was one girl who did all. And , as usual, we are apart now. I don't know who to blame for it. I took the decision to leave the country, circumstances favored it and time didn't create any problem..!

Now, here I am, sitting thousands of miles away from her wondering whether or not we will ever meet and searching Her in every new girl I meet. It’s crazy, it’s strange but don't blame me because it’s Inexplicable!

I think Her being a girl is not an issue here. It’s her persona that I miss. Her habits, her energy, her craziness, her concern, her care, her……the list goes on..!

Her carelessness hurt me sometimes because I am a kind of person who likes to have some order in life. But a super-extended sorry, till the “y” starts to sound like “e”, always worked. It’s very human to be attached to someone who makes you feel special. And she did that. She would talk to me when she was happy, sad or tensed. She shared, I shared. What else could I have possibly asked for? Or should I have asked for more? I would never know. She was "just a friend"...and I was contended ! I still am and I always will be.

I am in a strange phase of my life now. I try to find Her in every person I meet. And strangely, I find some or the other trait of Hers in everyone. One is bubbly like Her , other is always in a hurry like Her. One of them seems all tensed and serious about studies and taking notes etc during the class and leaves all the concern before she walks out of the classroom!!! :) Someone is childish like Her and someone suddenly starts talking maturely….a special quality of Hers.

I am still searching but I have realized one thing, I would not find someone else like her. She would always be the yardstick against which I will judge people and possibly rate them.

Desire for More is the root cause of every success in this world.

I agree.

But there is a very thin line that separates Desire for More from Discontentment for Life. Ironically, Desire for More can lead you to such a point where there is just a Void which can’t be filled. So, logically I shall move on. But as I said, it’s crazy, it’s strange but don't blame me because it’s Inexplicable!

I am Searching YOU..!


  1. dude it sure is. but some relations are better in one state than the more desirous one. attempted transition may even be regressive. am not negative.. just sayin wat i think at 'say it all'..! I wonder how come such a great guy needs to 'search' fr her..!

  2. thanks nikhil
    ur comments are alwayz valued..!

  3. mathur sahab....
    u can b a gud writer...!!
    i seriously advise u... start writin somethin.. fr a long term....
    best of luck...!!


Now, it is time to be honest !